Dearest Angela,
How wonderful it was to see you during your vacation! How I loved every moment near you, seeing you with Dan! It is simply wonderful to watch the two of you relate to each other. You have hardly lost the glow of a new bride. You remind me of myself when I was your age.
Yet, I cannot say I love my dear husband any less after all these years. We have been through so many experiences together. We have survived so many things, not all of them pleasant.
You know I am saying this to encourage you, don’t you?
The things you shared with the family during your visit are truly hard, as the world views things. To lose his job, as Dan has, can be very humiliating to a man. Dan is bearing it well, so far, but you can do much to make this experience become a fond memory.
This is your goal.
Yes, some day you will be on the other side of this hard experience. I know that idea will not put food on the table, but it is the truth and Jesus said the truth can set you free.
For whatever reason, God has allowed this seeming trouble into your lives. You may not know why He has allowed it. You may not even feel sure that it is not the work of His enemy, instead. Nevertheless, you can know some things.
Of a certainty, you are to continue as Dan’s helpmeet.
I always wonder why we repeat the vow, “For better or for worse,” if we never think the “worse” might come. Oh, I know you plan to stay in your position as his wife, of course! I mean, though, that the work of helping him never ends.
No matter how he reacts or responds to this trial, you are to be his helper. You have not lost your job! For you, it is business as usual, or more than usual.
- He will likely be home more and he will have greater needs. Job-hunting will require more perfectly clean and ironed laundry.
- The very difficult burden of upcoming decisions will require more intense discussion, and, at the same time, perhaps fewer opinions from you.
- His being at home may make him more aware of your personal schedule, and, let’s face it; he will have more time to notice and maybe less patience to deal with how you manage chores, compared with his mother.
So, your job is to help him with these daily needs, but of more importance, your job is to perform willingly, cheerfully, and humbly.
Then there is the area of finances. How I wish I could absorb your bills! Each of us has his own choices to make, though, and if work does not come soon, Dan will have to decide what to eliminate. He may hate it. Throughout this entire ordeal, he may feel guilty, as if he is taking things away from you. Your job, then, is to care NOT for things.
What do I mean?
Sweetheart, you own a large house, an extra vehicle, several diamonds, and a couple of nice antiques that may have to go the way of all things. . . . No, I do not think you should not have things. I only know how hunger feels and how important food can be.
Whatever Dan decides in the future, you can decide right now that his will is your will.
So make up your mind to be the only thing that is not a problem in Dan’s life, and I’ll write more next week.
Love to you,
Aunt Vic
Photo credit: Hugo90
yes indeed, my friend. focus on each other, and his guidance. the rest is just things and can indeed go. well said.
It is so true that we have more than we need, but also very true that a man usually, naturally wants to provide us “things”. Bless them!